We scored two Matson keychains. You are only supposed to get one, but we were fortunate enough to have TWO Matson “Thanks for doing business with Matson” keychains.  How you ask? Well, on the way out of the wood paneled trailer confirming that our newly waxed and shop-vacced car from Chicago in fact had a reservation for a fabulous three week cruise to Kahului, I picked up a Matson keychain out of the wicker basket on the counter.

Gary, the kind Matson representative showed us where to park the car: “behind the Toyota whatever” and “put the wheel on the white painted line.” We parked behind the Toyota or whatever, Kent got out and a second Matson keychain was placed on our keys. Gary said, “You only get one!” Of course, I blurted out, “But I already stole one from the counter!” Apparently, Gary’s wife similarly blurted out unnecessary information when coming back from Italy, blurting out that she had a plant in her luggage when she wasn’t even asked. We all laughed at my and Gary’s wife’s stupidity. Then he told me that it was illegal to take photos while at a port. I put my camera away, happy I was able to take a second keychain and photos of the port with me. Our car was on its way.

Gary was really helpful and personable. He even knew a trusted cabbie so he called us a cab and we waited, now homeless and carless, for our paid ride to the hotel.

Awesome cabbie took us the long way so he was able to show us the “foodie” part of town. We passed an In-and-Out-Burger (“why would you want to go to the In-and-Out-Burger?”) Carrow’s, Hagenburgers (“best burger in town”) and Francesco’s (“too expensive.”)

Expensive Francesco’s it is! We knew that when we passed the place we had to go there. It has not changed since 1960-something. Most of the staff has been there for 30 or more years. The menu is the same. The decor is the same. Everything is the same. The food was gray, both in flavor and in color. Normally I would say if the food is disgusting I wouldn’t recommend it to others, but if you ever find yourself in Oakland, California near the Oakland Airport, find Francesco’s and park yourself there for the night. Chat it up with your waiter. Get the Spumoni.

Oh, and Axl Rose and Brad Pitt have been there. They were completely unrecognized by the aging staff at first, which I find to be extra charming.